Her Diary

Life is so simple yet in so many ways complicated. We humans are so complicated in the head that we end up complicating everything. We meet people, interact, have fun, like some, dislike some, fall for some, some fall for us, while all this looks happy and simple by the word of it, but yet these things are so complicated. Well, if things were so simple, life would not have been interesting. Having an interesting life and a simple life is an irony in itself.

My friend  Avantika, a sweet bubbly girl in nature and very likable, is going through a break-up. Now a days breakup isn't that big a deal but she is my friend, and her pain is my pain. She had a good long relation, the guy was decent too. He did not cheat on her nor did she cheat on him. But, just their differences became too big for them to handle. She is hurt that her relation is breaking and that she is not able to do anything to keep it together. I know she tried to, but sometimes the differences are so big that even the people involved do not have any control over them.

Pain and ego may be enemies to us but together their friendship is a disaster for us. When we get hurt by the people we love, there is a pain that we experience and that pain over the times nurtures our ego in such a way that  ego is then dependent on the pain. Lot of “experienced blessed souls” tell us that we should kill our ego, which is by all means true and I abide by it, but is killing your ego that easy?

Avantika, really loved Rahul (her boyfriend) and even he loved her dearly, but with these differences somewhere their power of love was losing. Again, when the “experienced blessed souls” tell us that love has the greatest power to overcome anything, did they really mean it or it just sounded right to say?

It is really sad that relations break and feelings become sour. When everything starts with like and love then why do they end up with anger and hatred. May be hatred is too big a word, I think they are just too painful souls who cannot carry their own pain and therefore find it easier to blame it on the other.

Avantika asks me many questions- “Why did this happen?” “Why did he do this?” “Why this can’t work?”...etc. These are just too many questions for which I am trying my best to give her positive and feel good answers, believing which she may feel better. I am playing my role of her friend and also praying that her questions get answered soon. The truth is some questions always just remain questions for a very long time, but eventually we do find the answers and or may be believe that this was the answer. Till then our life journey goes on, may be with an unfilled space in our mind and heart but still with the hope of finding the answer one day , it goes on.

We all are so caught up in different emotions that with time we bury them in ourselves. We do not realize that what situation or person or thing may bring up those emotions back on the surface and then we are again caught up in our unanswered questions and the never ending hope.

I am there with Avantika to support her throughout, to tell her all the kind and great words like “All will be ok” “It was meant to be” etc but deep down she and I both know that it is her battle that she will have to fight it, first with herself then with the world and I am just a soldier who would be supporting her till she wins the battle and even after.